| Hindu Weddings | Tuesday |
| December 18, 2007 |
Hindu Weddings
The sights, sounds, colours, scents, and tastes of a Hindu wedding can be an overwhelming experience for a first timer. With a wedding that can last 6 days, or even more, there is a lot to know. From the many different elaborate ceremonies, to the general overall feel, a good overview of all the elements is a wonderful tool for anyone planning on attending, or photographing, such an event! So strap in as we take you through the steps of a typical Hindu wedding. But know this: every Hindu wedding that we have shot has been different in some way. No two are identical. Just be prepared for anything, enjoy every moment, even those spent waiting for things to start (because trust me, you will be waiting) and you'll discover that attending a Hindu wedding is not just an event, but an entire experience.
The Mendhi:
WHAT IT IS: Mendhi is commonly known as "henna" here in the West, and is a really awesome form of beautification. I love having my mendhi done, and even Rob has had it done once! It's a pretty simple event, but can take a long time!
The mendhi artist will apply the paste (which is usually greenish or blackish) to the bride's hands and feet. The other women who come for the event will also have their mendhi done as well, but the bride's is always the most elaborate, and is the only one who has it done on her feet. It can take upwards of 8 hours to complete the bridal mendhi! And afterwards one must be very careful not to touch anything with wet mendhi on, as it will smear. So you end up not using your hands for a couple hours while it dries! Fun!
After letting the mendhi dry (either for a few hours or even overnight) you scrape off the dry paste and beneath your skin is dyed red! This red colour usually lasts a couple of weeks.
The mendhi typically takes place two to three days before the actual ceremony. This is to give the mendhi time to set, and the colour to deepen. The warmer you keep your hands and feet, the darker the mendhi will turn out! Many people put cloves onto a pan, and then hold their hands over the smoke. I've also heard that a good coating of Vicks VapoRub left on overnight works. :)
Often mendhi artists will hide the groom's name or initials in the mendhi and it's up to him to find it!
Some grooms also get a bit of mendhi done, usually something very simple. Sometimes just a small design, sometimes the bride's name.
WHAT IT MEANS: I've been told many things about the meaning of mendhi. It's either that the darker the colour the more you love your mother in law, the darker the colour the more your mother in law loves you, the darker the colour the more you love your husband, the darker the colour the more your husband loves you....and the people who tell me each one swear it's right! So you can make up your own mind :) But the mendhi ceremony is mostly about getting all prettied up for a wedding, and spending time socializing and seeing the bride before the big day.
HOW TO PHOTOGRAPH IT: Unlike most things in a Hindu wedding, the mendhi is a slow moving event, giving you tons of time to experiment and get lots of different shots. It's always helpful to remember why the event is taking place in directing your focus. Remember: while the bridal mendhi is the focus of the event, those gathered around to share in the proceedings are also important. To me, it seems like the process of mendhi is just as important as the final result. So the shots of the aunties hugging the bride as she holds her hands far away to avoid smudging, the ladies with their hands out comparing how dark their colour is, the boys sitting off to the side bored out of their mind, all of this is important and will give a great feeling as to how the day went. Sometimes singing and dancing will break out, and there is always food. One of my favorite shots to get is the mom feeding the bride, since she can't use her hands to do it herself! Always very funny :) Other key shots include the groom's name hidden in the mendhi, the groom's mendhi, and the friends and family having their mendhi done. Expect 2-3 hours to properly cover a mendhi ceremony (not including Indian Standard Time).
(note: the Mendhi also occurs in much the same way for Sikh, Ismaili, Muslim, and many other cultural weddings)
The Haldi (aka. The Gaye Holud, Maya, or Pithi)
WHAT IT IS: Haldi literally means "turmeric" in Hindi. And believe you me, when you see what this ceremony is all about, you will completely understand where the name comes from!
This is another beautifying ceremony, but this time only the bride is prettied up (and not all the other women). And we use that term loosely here...
See, in this ceremony the bride is seated on a small stool and her family members and friends surround her (sometimes a shawl is held up over her head, and often they will sing specific haldi songs).
Then they all takes turns putting the paste (which is made up of turmeric) on the bride's face, arms and feet. Oil is also put into her hair. Sometimes they use small bundles of grass to put the thick yellow paste on, sometimes they use their fingers...and sometimes...
Well, sometimes they get a little carried away! Generally things look a little more like this:
The groom often has a haldi ceremony as well with his family. Here too they feed him
And make sure he's good and grimy
WHAT IT MEANS: From what I gather the turmeric paste is supposed to lighten and beautify the bride's skin before her wedding day. Overall it is a cleansing and purifying ceremony before the wedding takes place.
HOW TO PHOTOGRAPH IT: The haldi can last for a half hour to an hour, or can be over in an instant. So be prepared! It can be held indoors or outdoors, and with a shawl overhead blocking out light, you'll want to try and have a flash ready just in case. There are tons of great shots to be had: the reactions are always a good one, since it's pretty hilarious to see yellow paste smeared all over a friend. Make sure you're ready when the bride's close friends come up to the plate. They are the ones who usually get right into it, and make sure she's fully covered! Most of the people who put some haldi on the bride will want a photo of them looking into the camera, so be prepared to take a ton of those posed shots. And a detail shot of the bench, dish of haldi, and other accoutrements is always a good one :)
A great way to approach any wedding, be it a new culture to you, or a wedding you've shot a million times, is to think about the clients. They spent a long time making sure that plate with the haldi, the sweets, and the bracelets looked really good. Sure, all the other guests probably won't notice it, but if you, the photographer, notices it and makes a point to get a great shot of it, they will really appreciate it. Your mantra should be: what details did my client put a lot of effort into, what details did my client put a lot of effort into...and repeat. And if you're not sure if a specific detail is important....shoot it anyway! Trust me, when we started with these weddings, we didn't always know what was important. So just shoot everything and everyone. If they ask you afterwards "Why did you take a picture of this?" just use a vague, artistic answer like "The form of it moved me" and they'll leave you alone. Haha!
(note: the Haldi in Sikh weddings is very much the same, although they generally call it the Maya or Pithi. In Muslim weddings it's very similar, although it's called the Gaye Holud, and in the Ismaili wedding that we shot it was somewhat different. Check out all those pages for descriptions of the differences!)
The Chura
WHAT IT IS: The chura ceremony involves the bride's maternal uncles putting the bridal bracelets on and generally takes place the day before the wedding. It is often preceded by a short puja performed by the pandit (priest). Generally the bride sits surrounded by her family members. They make offerings to the gods as well as to the sacred fire.
Then they begin to prepare the bracelets. Milk is poured over them, and rose petals thrown on top
And finally the maternal uncles place the bracelets on.
Generally the bracelets are always red, and 21 in number, but as you can see in the photo above some brides are starting to break with tradition and get pink! Yay!
Then the bride's female friends tie small golden dangling ornaments called karliras onto her bracelets
Here's mom showing us the karliras
And the ladies tying them on!
The chura are then left on by the bride for many days. Generally it's meant to be for 40 days, although not all brides are quite that dedicated :)
WHAT IT MEANS: The bridal chura act to signify a woman's newly married status. Some say that the bride doesn't have to do housework while the bracelets are on, which would be very nice! But generally I think that doesn't happen. :)
HOW TO PHOTOGRAPH IT: The chura ceremony can be tricky to shoot if you're not in the right place. Everything centers around the bride, who is usually facing the pandit, so you need to be in between them. As long as you are quiet and respectful, we find that with these kinds of ceremonies people don't mind if we are up in the middle of all the action. Obviously you don't want to get in right in there, but we're usually standing just beside the